Friday, February 4, 2011


My 3 year old fancies herself a comedian. And truth be told, she is quite the little joker. I'm surprised at her sense of humor. She's so young and yet... I don't know. It's hard to explain. I'll have to show you. :-)

Lydia: know how you say 'butt' in sign language?
Me: How?
Lydia: a-l-a-n-n-a

Lydia: I don't know how to put the juicebox in my mouth.
Alanna: it's simple.
Lydia: No it's ELMO.
Alanna: No, I said it's SIMPLE.
Lydia: NO. IT'S. ELMO.
Me: Sweetie she's saying it's easy.
Lydia: Oh.

Lydia: Hey I wanted milk!
Me: You mean 'thank you mom'?
Lydia: Thank you mom.
Me: You're very welcome.
Lydia: Can you get me some milk?

Mom: Tara, she's upsetting me.... she's talking to the refrigerator.
Me: No, she's talking to the magnet ON the refrigerator.
Lydia: I'm talking to my kitties and my puppies. That's who I'm talking to. Hi-5 frigerator!

Lydia: Justin Bieber's a MAN. He's not a human.
Alanna: You mean a woman?
Lydia: He's not a woman!

Lydia: Hey I can't see!
Me: No more computer for you tonight.
Lydia: But I want to see a picture of you ugly!
Lydia: I want to see a picture of you ugly with me.

Lydia: Do I have to go away?
Me: Do you want to sit at the counter?
Lydia: No, I want to go away.

Mom: Where's my computer?
Lydia: Where's the beef?

Lydia: Can I have a popsicle?
Me: Not right now.
Lydia: Please?
Me: Not right now, maybe after lunch.
Lydia: But I said please. You have to give me one because I said please.
Me: No I don't.
Lydia: Then I'm getting one anyway.

Lydia: Mim
Me: Who am I?
Lydia: You're Uncle Putz.
Lydia: You're still Uncle Putz

Lydia: (kisses my cheek)
Me: Thank you
Lydia; Wipe it off.
Me: Why?
Lydia: Cuz I don't like your eyes.
Me: You don't like my eyes?
Lydia: No.

Lydia: Say hi grandma Betty.
Me: .....
Lydia: Cuz you're a little pig, mama.
Me: .....
Lydia: What big EARS you have grandma. (Smacks self in face with little canvas purse

Lydia (looking at my arms): Mommy you have hair!
Me: Yes, I do.
Lydia: You need to shave it off or somethin'

Lydia: Mama say "knock knock"
Me: Knock knock.
Lydia: I can't come to the door, I'm naked.

Me: I love you.
Lydia: I want cake.
Me: I love you.
Lydia: I want cake.
Me: I Love You!!
Lydia: I love you too, but I want cake

Lydia: here's your money grandma.
Me: I'm not your freakin' grandma!
Lydia:.... here's your freakin' money grandma.
Me: Oops.

Lydia: Mommy you have a baby in your belly button.
Me: No Mommy's just fat.
Lydia: You're fat? No, you're just a wiggly worm


  1. LMBO! Those are great. For some reason the "I don't like your eyes" one nearly made me wet my pants. Not to mention the "Knock, Knock" one. Those.Are.Great. You have to write those down for later... like when boyfriends show up. XD

  2. LoL. :-) I'm glad you got a laugh out of them. Maybe I'll print them out and keep them tucked away for that very occasion. :-P

  3. haha the first one is the one that got me - a three year old! she's a smart cookie:-)

  4. I know! I couldn't believe she said that to me! My jaw literally dropped and she just laughed and laughed. It was crazy!

  5. I really want to learn sign language. I know some words, but I want to have a full conversation with a deaf person && have them teach me. Oh and the other thing about it, I am like 13 years old, I am not deaf, and I been interested in sign language sing I was 8.