My 3 year old fancies herself a comedian. And truth be told, she is quite the little joker. I'm surprised at her sense of humor. She's so young and yet... I don't know. It's hard to explain. I'll have to show you. :-)
Lydia: know how you say 'butt' in sign language?
Me: How?
Lydia: a-l-a-n-n-a
Lydia: I don't know how to put the juicebox in my mouth.
Alanna: it's simple.
Lydia: No it's ELMO.
Alanna: No, I said it's SIMPLE.
Lydia: NO. IT'S. ELMO.
Me: Sweetie she's saying it's easy.
Lydia: Oh.
Lydia: Hey I wanted milk!
Me: You mean 'thank you mom'?
Lydia: Thank you mom.
Me: You're very welcome.
Lydia: Can you get me some milk?
Mom: Tara, she's upsetting me.... she's talking to the refrigerator.
Me: No, she's talking to the magnet ON the refrigerator.
Lydia: I'm talking to my kitties and my puppies. That's who I'm talking to. Hi-5 frigerator!
Lydia: Justin Bieber's a MAN. He's not a human.
Alanna: You mean a woman?
Lydia: He's not a woman!
Lydia: Hey I can't see!
Me: No more computer for you tonight.
Lydia: But I want to see a picture of you ugly!
Me:...
Lydia: I want to see a picture of you ugly with me.
Lydia: Do I have to go away?
Me: Do you want to sit at the counter?
Lydia: No, I want to go away.
Mom: Where's my computer?
Lydia: Where's the beef?
Lydia: Can I have a popsicle?
Me: Not right now.
Lydia: Please?
Me: Not right now, maybe after lunch.
Lydia: But I said please. You have to give me one because I said please.
Me: No I don't.
Lydia: Then I'm getting one anyway.
Lydia: Mim
Me: Who am I?
Lydia: You're Uncle Putz.
Me:.....
Lydia: You're still Uncle Putz
Lydia: (kisses my cheek)
Me: Thank you
Lydia; Wipe it off.
Me: Why?
Lydia: Cuz I don't like your eyes.
Me: You don't like my eyes?
Lydia: No.
Lydia: Say hi grandma Betty.
Me: .....
Lydia: Cuz you're a little pig, mama.
Me: .....
Lydia: What big EARS you have grandma. (Smacks self in face with little canvas purse
Lydia (looking at my arms): Mommy you have hair!
Me: Yes, I do.
Lydia: You need to shave it off or somethin'
Lydia: Mama say "knock knock"
Me: Knock knock.
Lydia: I can't come to the door, I'm naked.
Me: I love you.
Lydia: I want cake.
Me: I love you.
Lydia: I want cake.
Me: I Love You!!
Lydia: I love you too, but I want cake
Lydia: here's your money grandma.
Me: I'm not your freakin' grandma!
Lydia:.... here's your freakin' money grandma.
Me: Oops.
Lydia: Mommy you have a baby in your belly button.
Me: No Mommy's just fat.
Lydia: You're fat? No, you're just a wiggly worm
LoL. :-) I'm glad you got a laugh out of them. Maybe I'll print them out and keep them tucked away for that very occasion. :-P
ReplyDeletehaha the first one is the one that got me - a three year old! she's a smart cookie:-)
ReplyDeleteI know! I couldn't believe she said that to me! My jaw literally dropped and she just laughed and laughed. It was crazy!
ReplyDeleteI really want to learn sign language. I know some words, but I want to have a full conversation with a deaf person && have them teach me. Oh and the other thing about it, I am like 13 years old, I am not deaf, and I been interested in sign language sing I was 8.
ReplyDelete